Q: OK, I need to know if I am over-reacting. My daughter has started Kindergarten and it has been a vast improvement for her compared to how she was faring in her last daycare. For the last week she has been telling me stories of how this 5 year old boy "Duncan" loves to chase her and her friend "Trixie" at recess. Duncan calls her and Trixie his girlfriend although my 5 y.o. says he is not her boyfriend b/c she doesnt like him. The story then progressed to "Duncan is going to try to kiss us when he catches us." Duncan never catches her, and that is, I assume, part of the fun. I also assume, Duncan will never catch them. Ok, kid is having fun in Kindergarten. Good. Well, tonight 5 y.o. begins to tell me the same story, which is, of course very exciting for her to tell. So, we begin, her very excited, and I of course, very excited to listen. Then, she tells me in her excited voice that Duncan said he is "going to have sexes with us when he catches us" I STOP. Not so funny anymore. I believe, Duncan more than not acutally said sex, but b/c 5 y.o. never even heard the word in her life, nor has a clue what it means - repeats it as "sexes" b/c there is 2 of them. Her and Trixie. When I tell her that what Duncan said is inappropriate and a naughty thing for a 5 y.o. to say... she thinks it is even more intriguing that Mom doesnt like this new game. She says "no, Mom, he really said it AND he is going to kiss us using his tounge." When I become a little more clear, and a little more firm, that I dont think its funny, and I REALLY dont like what Duncan is saying - she got my drift. Duncan did a bad thing. AM I TOTALLY OVER REACTING that I want to ring this little boys neck? And dont give me " the poor boy" stuff - he only learns what his parents taught, ect. ect, ect, I WANT TO RING HIS PARENTS NECK TOO! She is my 1st, and my baby, and while I get I may be more sensitive, I surely never thought I'd be "uptight" mom. This cant be par for course of what 5 y.o.'s know.... no way! Yes, my hband and I want rainbows and sunshine for her for now... neither of us got it growing up, and childhood is for such a short, short time. I need some insight from someone (parents) that have been through this before?? I know, I am in for a long, long ride now that she's hit school. I guess what my question is... am I overreacting? what is my reaction supposed to be to this story? Do I talk to her teacher? Is my child completely naive? Is this little boy completely inappropriate? I cant help but think this is way out of line for what my daughter is aware of.. and her neighborhood friends as well! Parents our there... help! thanks everyone - I ended up talking to her teacher, who then informed the "behavriol intervention specialist". The kids all had a pow -wow w/ her and talked about appropriate and not - and to get the details to make sure no one is being hurt, ect. She told me at pick up she played w/ Duncan, " but dont be made because the "bip slip" teacher made it ALLLLL ALLLRIIIIGGGGHHHTT!" She sd he cried the whole time and said he was sorry, ect. they discussed what would happen next time, ect. the school is follwoing up w/ his parents. Thank for validating my feelings! very helpful!
A: Thats terrible!! I thought the kissing with the tongue was way over the limit for a 5yo to say but how/ would a 5 yo say that he wanted to have sex with some girl??? I think you should have a talk with the teacher and the principal.. Thats what I would do if some boy was saying that to my daughter. Then I would tel my daughter that its not a good idea for her to play so much with that boy since he doesnt use such nice words.. I wouldnt say that the boy was a terrible little boy since he does hear the things from his parents or older siblings, but I would just let her know that he is using very bad words and might not even know what they mean and that she should find some other little kids to play with in the mean time.. Good Luck and No I do niot think you are overreacting..