Q: Do you have to go to bed when the baby does? I mean you cant leave them alone in a bed with no sides and big blankets right? Also how do you go about being intimate with your partner?
A: Initially, I was so tired I went to sleep with my daughter at night :) When she was around two months old, I wanted to have a bit more of an adult schedule again - and she slept in the middle of the bed with no bedding nearby, in an 'infant positioner' (made of foam, with foam sides, to keep them from rolling around and is wedge shaped to keep them up at a slight angle -- they sell them at Babies R Us and similar stores) with pillows on the sides of the bed well away from her. She was not rolling on her own then. By five months old, rolling became a concern (this could happen earlier for you) so we moved the crib into our room and started putting her to sleep in her crib, and transitioning her to our bed when she cried in the middle of the night and we were in bed. Still breastfeeding, so night wakings are common throughout the first year for breastfed babies. Now, at nine months old, our daughter sleeps most of the night in her crib in her room, and then comes to bed with us for the last 2-3 hours in the morning. She is still breastfed, so does wake up 2-3 times at night and she doesn't come to bed with us until the last feeding usually. She is great about crib or bed, both have been very natural for her from a young age. As she spends a lot of time in her crib, as well - I don't have to worry about her in the bed when I am not there (which would definitely be a problem for our very active 9 month old!). You don't have to go to sleep when they do - but beyond the first few months, as soon as rolling comes into play, you should have a safe alternative to the family bed for when you are not there with them. As far as intimate time - you can have that in another room (guest bed, couch, or be creative!) - for most people I know that co-sleep, they find places and it is not that inconvenient, and often more fun ;) Co-sleeping has been a wonderful and healthy experience for all of us - we wouldn't have changed a thing!